I wrote here about anger issues I recently needed to deal with. Theories on unravelling anger issues has been something I've been paying attention to lately.
When Our Button Gets Pressed
A couple of speakers I listened to not so long ago pointed out that sometimes anger results when a button inside ourselves is pressed. This button may have nothing to do with the person who made us angry. They may not know anything about our button. The result is an over-reaction on our part. And if we're not careful, we might lash out at them, at others, or show a side of us we may wish we hadn't.
Say, for instance, I'm sensitive about my weight and you make a weigh-related comment to me. What you say may be true. It may be about you or something you've learned. But as you say it, my weight-sensitive button gets pressed. I feel you're directing your comment at me. I end up angered and hurt.
That's merely one example of a multitude of examples I could give.
The point is, it is more constructive to recognize our button and to take ownership of it. We need to address our relationship to the button. We need to pass the test of filtering the issue. We need to learn how to not let what's been said take us down.
When you feel your button has been pressed, take that as a sign God himself is allowing you to be tested. Ask him to help you and ask yourself what you need to deal with.