Wednesday, April 01, 2015

New eBook for Midlife Christian Women


Introducing my new eBook.  What started out as a short workbook, led to months of editing.  And, it's finally up on Amazon.  It attempts to explain the epiphany I had about the importance of a woman tapping into her top passions in order to narrow down what to work on in midlife.  

As I say to most, I'm not you, you're not me, so I have no idea if you'll connect with what I've written.  All I know is I sought new direction for years and became very disappointed when I couldn't seem to find what it is God wanted me to spend my time on that would be as meaningful as my role of raising my children.  Then I had an epiphany.  Through a passion and purpose hunt, I narrowed down my top five passions and dedicated myself to develop them.

Now, you may think you know your top five passions.  Maybe you do.  I pretty much knew mine, but in the end after going through the template I created, saw a switch. Actually, I had about 20 passions at the time, and the problem was I kept flip flopping on what to work on.  I'd look into courses for this, that, and the other thing.  I applied for all types of jobs.  I thought of joining all types of groups. I discovered, too many passions kept me from feeling focused.

I recall a time years ago when I had no new dreams.  That scared me.  I think I was about 48.  I was leading a group of women, encouraging them to capture their dreams, but I had none!  

I also recall battling between my moods in a flip flopping role of part-time empty nest mom.  As our children transition, we do too.  

If you're looking for some new guidance about what to spend your time on next in midlife, this book may help you.  Only currently available in Kindle format on Amazon. 

I don't publicize it for the money.  Heck, I'll never recoup enough money for the hours and hours I spent writing and editing it!  Even the price you'll see isn't what I receive.  My goal is to get my message out to help other women.  

     

Monday, March 23, 2015

Women and Moods

 
Make Your Dreams a Reality!



Many women think a lot.  We wonder.  We ponder.  We analyze.  We are sometimes proud of our wisdom, and sometimes annoyed at the over-analysis we do.  Our own thoughts bring us down many times.  We live in perception instead of getting the facts straight.  Sometimes, we project our feelings on unsuspecting people. 

We might be peaceful and joyful one day, and down and low in confidence the next.  It's just so much to handle!

Sometimes thoughts are driven by overwhelm, tiredness, or physical pain. Getting rest will be helpful.

Sometimes thoughts are associated with a process of grieving. We grieve changes.  We grieve losses. Grieving is a normal part of letting go. Small spurts of grief are healthy. It's okay to feel pain.  .
 
Some feelings are driven by melancholy. This might include focusing on the good old days, the old friends, you years as a preschool child's mother. Sometimes a movie, music or possession triggers sad feelings. 

Feelings aren't bad.  They're part of the human condition.  But it's not good to get stuck in them. We all benefit from learning how to process our feelings.

Move On

Author Susan Miller says it's helpful to feel feelings and then move back into the present quickly.  She suggests a woman learn to cherish good times, but to be cautious of clinging to them.  A good way to move on is to train your brain to focus on new goals.  Another way to move on is to consider possibilities.  Thinking positive thoughts is always helpful.

When overcome by moods, it can be helpful to simply look at what is in front of you and tend to the associated tasks. 

If moodiness is sticking around, maybe it's time for a physical checkup, change of scenery, time to change something you're doing in your life.

Relax

Having times of peaceful Bible reading and prayer is key to managing moods.  Try reading through the Book of Psalms.  Sit in a relaxing pose and do deep breathing.   

Drink water.  Do things you enjoy.  Let your creativity out.  Try dancing, colouring, or taking fun photos.

Take Steps

What steps do you need to  take to process your moods?

Here are a few prompting questions:

  1. Do you have a journal to write your thoughts in?
  2. Does exercise as simple as going for a brisk walk help relieve them?
  3. Do you mind your nutrition to ensure you're eating brain-healthy food?
  4. Do you get regular physical checkups?
  5. Do you take brain and body-healthy supplements?
  6. Do you have someone to share your feelings with?
  7. Do you pray?
  8. Do you use positive self-talk.
  9. Do you take confidence in God's guidance?
  10. Do you go easy on yourself?


  

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

What's Working?

So busy working on my next eBook I have no time to write.  Pictured is a working title and cover for the upcoming book.
Working Title/Cover
 of New eBook

In the meantime, here is a tidbit for you.

Focus on what's working.

That's right.  Start your day with looking at what's working, what you've done well, what you have that you are thankful for.

Stop habits of looking for problems.  Stop thinking negatively.  Stop reporting on what's not working. Stop complaining.  Stop worrying about problems, give them to God.

Doing this simple act of focusing on what's working will help your life immensely. 

Monday, March 02, 2015

Fight the Good Fight Against Depression




I didn't write my last post on depression because I was depressed.  I wasn't, but I know this time of year is hard for many people, and I too need to stay alert.

Tonight I watched TSN's Michael Landsberg's short story on depression entitled, Darkness and Hope: Depression, Sports and Me.  I gleaned several points from the guests that I'd like to share with you now.

The guests were former athletes, which we know is a short-lived career.  If a person's value is wrapped up in what they do, they are vulnerable for depression when it's taken away.

For many women, it may not be our sport we wish we could go back to, but our old fun self, our school days, our dating years or early marriage, our time with toddlers, our career we once had, our attractive slim body, you name it.   Moving forward is all part of aging.

Achieving success or fame doesn't prevent or cure depression. Forgive me for not remembering all their names, but one former athlete, a Stanley Cup winner, admitted he was depressed during the hockey series. He removed himself from being in the winning photographs, and became severely depressed the week after winning the Stanley Cup with his team.

So it's not fame and lack of fame that causes depression, depression is a chronic illness that can be debilitating if not managed.

Canadian Olympian Clara Hughes says you never know when that one little thing will trigger you. She fears those triggers, as do I.

But it is more than a trigger that brings on depression, it is a biochemical issue connected to triggers.  That is why medication helps many women cope.  There is a brain chemistry mix-up that medication can help put into balance.  The triggers, on the other hand, are usually connected to thoughts which can often be helped with therapy.

Talk it Out

But we can't just call up our therapist at a moment's notice.  We need someone else to talk to from time-to-time. 

Some of the guests on the presentation mentioned how important their significant other was in helping them cope.  Talking it out helps immensely. Unconditional love does too.

If you don't have a significant other to talk to about your depression, you might want to call a trusted friend, or call a hotline like Telecare or Distress Centre in your area.  

You may need to visit your doctor and tell him or her you need help. You may benefit from seeing a counsellor.  Your work medical plan may cover the cost.

The guests emphasized the need for having their own "system" in place to help them with the threat of an episode.  I liked the sound of that and wished they would all have shared their personal systems.

I too have a system in place and I will share that in another post.  

When threatened with depression, we need hope. Hearing others' stories sometimes gives us that hope.

If you're prone to depression, tell someone. Fight it. Create a system. Hang on to hope.  


Pray to me when you are in trouble! I will deliver you.  Psalm 50:15 NET Bible